We're Not Friends!

“My friends,” he said, over and over again. Or “my fellow Americans,” he would say. Gulp. Gulp. With each of those simple phrases, my friends and I were forced to drink. It wasn’t our fault, though. Those were the rules of the game. Any time McCain says “my friends,” “my fellow Americans,” or “when I was a POW,” we had to drink. By the end of the debate, I was tired of listening to him talk. All that alcohol was giving me a headache.

To start – calling us “your friends” does not make it so. This is a transparent strategy of yours, to make us feel more at ease with your old, crusty, discomforting mannerisms. As soon as he stepped foot on the stage I shifted in my seat. He’s just soooo awkward. Even his smiles are forced and premeditated. Imagine what must happen when he’s around small children. He probably frightens them - to the point that they scream for their mothers and have to be escorted out of the room.

Secondly – chill with all of your condescending, curt, paternalistic remarks. We can clearly see you’re old enough to be Obama’s dad. You don’t have to act like it with every remark. “Haha, thanks Tom, I’ll actually answer the question this time,” McCain said to Brokaw in a rebuttal statement towards Obama. Whoa. For real? You want to take it there? Please do answer the question, sir, because you didn’t answer very many of them last night. You and Palin have this diluted belief that if you constantly refer to your talking points, the audience will eventually forget what the question even was. Not the case last night, thanks to dear old CNN. They posted each question in the lower-third of the screen to ensure viewers could tell whether or not it was being answered. Obama’s answers were detailed, thorough, and thoughtful. McCain’s “answers” were…non-existant. Between snide retorts, fake laughter and his Hitler-esque gestures to the audience, I don’t think he managed to answer a single question.

Did I mention that me makes me uncomfortable?

Third, and finally – have the American people not consistently said “we’re not interested in your smear campaigns”?? Dude, fall back with all that. Attacking Obama is not doing anything for you. You’re slipping in the polls and you’re upset about it. That is understandable. But attempting to tie him to terrorists (low blow) when you, yourself have done some low-down, shameless things (like divorcing your first wife after a near-fatal car accident), is hypocritical to say the least. I lose more and more respect for McCain and the Republican Party each day. In fact, from now on, I’ll call the man John. He gets no deference from me.

I must admit, per one of my earlier posts, this election is producing some of the best reality TV I’ve ever seen. Stay tuned. John and Sarah are going to turn this country upside down before they get voted off. But be encouraged… because those two will, indeed, be voted off… on November 4, 2008. I would go ahead and schedule time off for the following day. All kinds of history are bound to ensue…