Pastor, Are You Sure?

Between A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle and the scriptures from Sunday’s service, I am struggling to apply what I have learned to my everyday life.

I went to church looking for a Word. God must have heard my prayers, because he spoke directly to me this past Sunday. “Victory is achieved in the valley, not at the mountaintop,” the pastor proclaimed. “If we would deal with a crisis the way GOD would have us to, then everything would be okay.” So. True.

And yet, once instructed to turn to the corresponding biblical passage, many questions arose. The pastor began with Romans 7:14 – 25 dwelling particularly on verses 21 – 23 (or perhaps, those were the ones most poignant to me).

According to the New International Version, they read:

21 So I find it to be a law that when I want to do what is good, evil lies close at hand. 22 For I delight in the law of God in my inmost self, 23 but I see in my members another law at war with he law of my mind, making me captive to the law of sin that dwells in my members.

The scripture is discussing the difference between our “self” that dwells in the Spirit, and our “self” that dwells in the flesh (which, to a degree, parallels Tolle’s differentiation of the “self” and the “ego”). Many of us (including me) all too quickly succumb to the wants and desires of the flesh, when we should ultimately spend all of our time in the Spirit. It is when we overcome our earthly, carnal needs that we can truly bask in the goodness of the Lord. We are liberated once we live in the Spirit, and not the flesh. God expects us to do this. He expects us to overcome our earthly desires, cease our sinning and exercise self-control. When we are living in the Spirit – without sin – we are as close to God as ever.

Two things:

1. If we are to live in the Spirit, without sin, we are bordering the concept of perfection, right? I mean, if we’re living without sin, that means we’re perfect. We’re not doing anything wrong. We’re living and practicing the Word of God. And yet, in childhood, I was taught that we were all sinners. We will all, ultimately, fall short. That’s not to say “don’t try”. Of course, we should rise each morning with our minds made up that we will do our best to follow God’s path for us. But, we are mortals. Try as we may, we will never be without sin. We will never be perfect.

2. I take real issue with that. Never mind some of the overly conservative preachings of the church (another post – I promise), but to preach that an individual can attain a sinless state (i.e.: perfection) is blatantly bogus. No one is perfect! No one ever will be! This suggestion is particularly bothersome to a young adult still struggling to find her path. The notion that perfection is attainable is… is a sobering falsity.

The pastor proposed that we can all control our words, our thoughts, our emotions, our eyes, our flesh, our actions, our habits, and thus, our future.

I concur – to a degree.


I can control my words.

I try to control my thoughts, but find it increasingly difficult. I think too much. I think thoroughly. I ask lots of questions. I theorize. I hypothesize. I ponder… One thought leads to 1000 more. It is what it is.

I cannot control my emotions. I’m pretty sure men can. I bet a handful of women can, too. I, however, cannot.

I can control my eyes.

I can control my flesh.

I can control my habits.

I can control my future! (Well, I can try to.)


I believe I am in control of my destiny. I know that the steps – and missteps – that I make today will impact tomorrow and afterwards. But, just because I apply for 100 jobs and nobody calls me back, does not mean I didn’t hold up my end of the bargain. Sometimes all of the “control” I exercise through my words, thoughts, actions, etc., still manages to get me nowhere.

I would like to see a husband in my future (the far, far away future – but future, no less). Exercising “control” over that goal means: I can date; I can keep in touch with ex-boyfriends; I can meet new guys, mingle at E.B.P. mixers, wine & dine, smile and bat my lashes… But, we all know that the “relationship status” is ultimately left to the man’s discretion. When HE is ready for one, it will be so. Clearly, I can’t control that either.

I get what the pastor was saying. We must exercise discipline in all of our life endeavors if we’re looking for favorable outcomes. And though nothing is promised, we are better equipped for success and God’s Glory when we have been disciplined and self-controlled.

I’m just saying…

We can strive for perfection, but we must realize we will never attain it.
And, I firmly believe we can control our destiny – though what we have in store for ourselves may not always align with what the Maker has in mind.